A healthy relationship demands equal amounts of effort, understanding, communication, loyalty and trust from both ends to make things work out. It is also important to create a healthy space in communication for the exchange of emotions. “When you feel like your partner isn’t making an effort to understand your point of view, to listen or take on board what you’re saying, it feels like rejection which sparks disconnection. It makes sense really. Connection is about just that…, connecting and when you are interrupting, disregarding your partner’s perspective or not listening to their side you’re not connecting, you’re rejecting,” wrote Therapist Lucille Shackleton.
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Ways to be more open to the partner’s perspective:
Holding space: Validating the feelings of the partner does not mean that we need to agree with their perspectives all the time. However, it is important to hold space for them where they can feel safe to communicate their feelings with us.
Accepting their perspective: When we accept the perspective of another person. It makes them feel more seen and heard. This can lead to deeper intimacy and connections in the relationship, alleviating the risk of frustration and resentment.
Prioritising relationship: Sometimes there might be situations where we may feel that we are agreeing with something that we do not believe in. However, we should also make a choice between prioritising the relationship and being right in the argument.
Being open to differences: Embracing the differences and the imperfections makes a healthy relationship. Just because the partner has a different perspective, does not make our opinion right.
Addressing the differences: We need to delve deep into the differences to understand why we have varied perspectives. Understanding it will give us more clarity about ourselves as well as the partner.
Opportunity to learn more: People’s perspectives are often shaped by their value system, their past experiences, their family ethics and their upbringing. This can be an opportunity to learn more about them.
Equality: We should know that our perspectives are equally important as that of the partner, and we should refrain from creating competition about it.
Relationship satisfaction: Being open to accepting the perspective of another person can lead to relationship satisfaction and help in creating a healthy and safe relationship.